Midway Point in Life

Author: sethskim  |  Category: Values, Various, Viewpoint

 
mid-life-pic
Photo by Strength For Today
 
 
 
Today I celebrated my 40 year birthday. I was trying really hard to allow it to slip under the radar, but to no avail because Christina threw a big 40th B-Day party with some people in church the other day. It was humbling, not only to see all the people there, but to be reminded that we have some awesome people in our church.

I don’t know if I am in denial about entering into the middle-age stage of life. Not even with all the reminders of people saying, “The 40’s are the NEW 30’s” could change the fact of what I was feeling in the last couple of days.

Christina always would say (back in my 20’s and 30’s) that the mid-life crisis would hit me really hard due to my personality and the way I am wired up. I am trying to take everything in stride. I guess it might take another few weeks or months for things to really hit me.

But as I come to this midway point in my life, I am thankful for all the things that God has allowed me to experience and go through. Yes, that means even all the bad that sometimes comes along with the good.

As I reflect on this day, I am coming to grips with:

1) My own depravity. I think when we are younger we don’t have a realistic view of ourselves (we have a tendency to over-estimate ourselves). But as we get older, we go through various things in life – many times those are humbling things and it just reminds us that we are truly human. Not only human, but we begin to realize that we are more sinful that we thought. It is a humbling process but we all need to go through it. In fact, as we go through it we become awakened to God’s grace more and also learn how to appreciate His mercy and forgiveness in a whole new way.

2) My own deficiencies. It is hard for perfectionistic people to talk about their deficiencies because they are constantly in the mode of trying to improve. But as reality begins to set in, the realization of our weaknesses and limitations become more glaringly evident. It is amazing that in our younger years, we felt as if we can conquer the world. Now, I am just wondering if I can conquer my own heart. This is when the Apostle Paul’s words to the people of Corinth rings true – “I delight in weaknesses… For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Co 12:10).

3) My decisions. I have always been a person who wanted to live life without regrets. This meant that no matter what decisions I had to make, I would always ask myself, “Is this something that you can live with?” The problem with this mentality it that we can be blindsided by our self-centeredness and selfishness. The decision might be something that we can live with, but we forget about the ramifications on people around us. I am realizing how much of my past decisions have marginalized my family, friends and people that I work with.

4) My dreams. As we get older, it is harder to dream big dreams. Whether it is due to all the disappointments or failures, there is something about settling for something less as we get older. This is something that I fear and dread. I still feel there are some dreams that I am trying to live out. But then again, I am also coming to the conclusions that unless it is God’s dream, it will all be meaningless.

5) My destiny. I am a person who is constantly emphasizing the importance of living out our destiny and moving more towards God’s purposes. So often we want to know what our destiny is all at once. This desire to know everything just feeds the need of a person who wants to control everything. But as I am getting older, I am realizing that knowing our destiny can sometimes be more of a mystery and something that we stumble across, than trying to figure it all out. God might just give us glimpses of our destiny but it is crucial that we take the tiny steps in faith. This will remind us that little acts of faith are just as important (if not more) as the final destination. When we get too caught up with the “end goal” we miss out on a lot of things on life.

 
 
Even though I don’t know how many more years God will give me here on this earth, but the lessons in the mid-way point of my life will hopefully be something that I keep growing in with God’s grace.

Comments are closed.