Returning to the Grid

 
It has been about two weeks since I have written in my blog (and Twitter). In the first couple of days, I felt like an addict going through withdrawal symptoms and having a nervous breakdown (half-joking). But it has been good for my soul.

The last few months have been one of toughest periods of my life. There have been trials and testing before in my life, but this period has been especially difficult. It was a combination of several enormous things coming at me all at once. Things that competed for my attention and responsibility were pressing hard against me.

I guess we all have a different breaking point. But due to my stubbornness, God knew that He had to press me hard so that I will surrender and learn how to rely upon Him.

In this season, God is teaching me (once again) the importance of trust, faith, humility, and surrender. Sometimes we don’t realize that we have been trusting in circumstances and people until all those things are stripped away from us. Then we are left with a choice of either turning to ourselves or learning to trust in God.

It is easy to think that we have learned these lessons many years ago. It doesn’t help when you are a preacher and you have preached on this topic many times to your members. But the true test of the authenticity of a leader is his or her ability to lead people out of their own experiences – we cannot take people where we have not been before.

I know that the testing will not end. God is too passionate for us to allow us to just coast by in our journey, as a Christ-follower. But the hope is that we will become more like His Son with each passing day. We have to progress rather than regress.

I am learning to appreciate things more. Everything I have and everything that I am called to do is a gift from God. I have to steward it well or God will take it away from me and give it to someone else.

In the last several weeks the song, “For My Good” by Lashun Pace has ministered to me and has allowed me to gain the perspective that so many Christ-followers have gained over the years. The lyrics to the song goes like this:

Things I’ve gone through in life I thought was too hard for me to bear
The enemy tried some time to make me feel just like God did not care
But I remember reading in God’s Word
Where He wouldn’t put more on me than I could bear.
Yes, Jesus cares and all that I’ve endured was only for my good.

Now I know it was for good, but for His Glory
For my good, yes it was, but for His Glory
For my good, all that I’ve endured, but god gets the Glory.

For my good, yes it was, but for His Glory
For my good, but for His Glory
For my good, all that I’ve endured,
All the hurt
All the pain
All that I’ve endured
All the tears in the midnight hour
All that I’ve had to endure in my life
Everything you ever had to face in your life
All that you have endured
Is for your good, but for His glory,
All I have endured

BRIDGE
For my good (4xs)
Didn’t see it then, but
For my good (2xs)
All that I’ve endured
But God gets all the Glory.

You can listen to the song here.

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body.” (2 Cor 4:7-11)